minor freak out

So I'm freaking out a little bit about this whole preggo thing. Not being pregnant-- I genuinely like that. I think it's cool how your body changes and I even find the emotional outbursts a little bit enjoyable.

What I'm freaking out about is the having two actual kids, thing. Dealing with two. Not sleeping. Not losing my mind. Keeping my job. Keeping the peace. Keeping a house together (damn those dishes!).

People are not helpful. When I was in high school (and full of angst) I said that sometimes people like to see you drown, just to help wring the water from your clothes. I feel that way these days. People are saying the most HORRIBLE and probably truthful, things about what it's like to raise two kids. Basically hell on earth, no time EVER for yourself or spouse, feeling torn, neglecting someone all the time (most notably self)...

So I'm a little freaked. Get your kids to like each other. Give quality time equally. Be patient and kind. And forever understanding. Work hard at work, god forbid letting that slip. Keep it all... together.

I don't know if I can really do that.